Welcome back to SOLO at SIXTY!
Goodbye February, Hello March! Can you believe 2 months of 2019 are almost in the books? March 1st is momentous in many ways for me. March 1st is my dear nephew’s birthday (Jack’s dad), and that of one of my teammates. Two years ago, March 1st was the first day of Lent, a time of new beginnings and celebrations, and also the day my divorce became final. Funny, before becoming SOLO I proudly celebrated my wedding anniversary every August. But now, I celebrate March 1st as the day I began a new journey, where I rediscovered myself, and started to really enjoy my life.
“Have faith in your journey. Everything had to happen exactly as it did to get where you’re going next.”
Ever feel like you are “lost”? Just going through the motions, doing what you have always done? Thinking, “Wait until this or that happens, then I’ll be happy.” I now realize that I kinda “lost” myself pre-SOLO. As women especially, we tend to put ourselves last. But truly, we have to with the demands of a family and a career. Let me make this abundantly clear – I would NOT change one thing in my life with raising my children. I loved every minute and every stage of their lives. But there are other changes I would make if I had a mulligan (not Madigan, MULLIGAN!). I see many of the young moms today battling the same demands I faced. And truly, I am impressed (and a bit jealous!) that they seem to be able to pull it off so much better – they are in partnerships with their spouses, getting everyone ready for and to school and activities, grocery shopping, and meal preps, etc. Kudos to all the working moms out there and to the dads who help them out so they can get a work out in or a night out with their girlfriends.
“Sometimes when you lose your way, you find YOURSELF.”― Mandy Hale
One of my dear girlfriends always lets me vent to her on our walks. We bitch together, and she always ends up making me feel better about myself and my life. Recently, she sent me a song she heard that made her think of me: Confetti by Gone West. She said this was definitely not applicable 2 years ago, but is now, and she is right. Two years ago I was floundering a bit, still trying to come to grips with what my new life was going to be like. Y’all, 2 years later, I am living proof that time does ease old wounds and life is what you make of it.
Honestly, at the time of the BIG “D”, I wondered if I would truly ever be happy SOLO. I was looking forward to hopefully closing that chapter of my life and beginning a new chapter, but also worried about what the finality would mean. It was a scary time. As it turned out, that new beginning meant having more fun, spending more time with my kids, family, and friends, and many more trips to the beach. I was back at it Sunday afternoon – having a glass wine on a beautiful Sunday afternoon with my younger daughter. Is this my new thing? If so, I am happy with it! Especially when my older daughter, son-in-law, and granddawg also decide to meet us and enjoy the beautiful afternoon outside on our Downtown mall! I do love my life! I have a lot of fun things lined up this spring and summer and am so looking forward to them all – not to mention WARM, SUNNY days. (That “S” word is in the forecast for this weekend… will winter ever end?)
“Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere you find yourself.”
Selfishly, I’ve been doing what I want to do, when I want to do it. But I also have some worries being SOLO – I am totally responsible for my financial well being and for what happens if I get sick or hurt. Actually this fear came to the forefront Monday, when I left work suddenly because I did not feel well. At all. And I am never sick, never! But boy, was I sick Monday. I barely made it home. My sister diagnosed it (long distance) as the norovirus. It was not pretty and I felt the worst I have ever felt. I had many offers of help but I did not want to infect anyone else and discovered I could take care of myself. But it was scary. Still feeling a bit shaky, but better. Today was supposed to be my first day back running, but it’s not happening. Just hoping I did not infect my family last weekend!
“Expect the unexpected. Life is full of wonderful things just waiting to surprise you.”
I cannot end without mentioning how happy last Wednesday night made me as Carolina beat Duke AT Duke – it was a BLOWOUT! I know, I know… but truly, even though Duke lost their big guy to a shoe malfunction (and I honestly hope he was not seriously injured), they still had powerful back ups, and we still beat them, BIG. And how sweet it was! I admit, I never saw that coming! GDTBATH! (Great Day To Be A TAR HEEL!)
Are YOU doing what YOU love? Are you loving your life, and yourself? If you remember last week’s blog, you have to love yourself before you can love others. In the words of Ru Paul at the end of every Drag Race episode: “If You Can’t Love Yourself How In The Hell Are You Gonna Love Somebody Else?”
Put yourself first every now and then. Do what you love. Have fun, especially with those you love, because as we all know, none of us is promised tomorrow.
“If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.” – Groucho Marx
PS Spring arrives in 21 days – MARCH 20, 2019 at 5:58 pm. Just sayin’!
3 thoughts on ““Confetti” – by Gone West, 2019”
Leslie, of course I can relate to your traveling solo but not for the same reason. K was slowly slipping away while I tried to prepare myself for that terrible day. It finally arrived the morning I gave her a big hug and realized she did not know who I was. Big men are not supposed to cry, but as you know, I am not a big man. I broke down and really bawled. Jim has been the strength I have had from that moment on. So where you have your kids surrounding you, I have Jim making my waning years the best. I follow your advice and make the best of each day for as you say, we are not promised tomorrow.
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You are the best Ed! What a great example you set for the WORLD!
This made me cry Ed! What a great example you set for us all… I am so thankful for my kids as I know you are so thankful for Jim! Keep living it up daily!